For almost four weeks now, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and Yours Truly have had an exceptional time together.

It has been the rich experience that I never thought I would experience until I retired from it all. But, if this is retirement, “Lord, so be it.”

Nothing to complain about here.

We have enjoyed spending quality time together and catching up on things that happened 50 years ago. His memory is much better than mine, without a doubt.

This free time has really been a rejuvenating experience, at least for me.

I must confess that I have had a pajama dilemma that I have never experienced before.

When do I take off my pajamas in the morning, get dressed, and then later when do I undress and put on my pajamas? This new program has not been clearly delineated, at least from my wife’s perspective. How long can I wear my pajamas? And do you wear a tie with pajamas?

I tried to explain to my wife that we are saving a lot of water by not having to do laundry as much as we used to. That doesn’t suit him.

Although we can have a fairly relaxed schedule, she still maintains a schedule.

Breakfast, lunch and dinner are always prepared at the same time every day. I wouldn’t mind if I chewed on something (other than veggies) throughout the day, particularly an apple fritter. But no, we are on a strict diet. And when I say “strict”, I mean what she chooses to cook.

Do not misunderstand; she is an excellent cook. It is the schedule with which I have a problem.

I said to him last week, “Why don’t you make me a good meal to eat and let me eat whenever I want?”

That sounded like a beautiful schedule to me, but it didn’t go very well for her. According to her, there is a time to eat, and then there is a time to NOT eat. She emphasized the word NO. I got the message.

For the past few weeks, my wife spent a lot of time in her “Craft Room.” She does a lot of crafts and I am not allowed in that room.

The other day, as I was walking through the craft room, I looked up and she said, “Is there anything you want?”

I knew the answer he was expecting, so I gave it to him and went to the other end of the house. She works a lot there. In fact, he has been making face masks for people.

With a smile on my face, I asked, “Are you going to make me a mask?”

Without even looking up, he said, “I don’t have enough material.”

There was no way I was asking him to explain what he meant by that. Deep down, he knew what he meant.

From time to time, he would ask me to do something, and I would reply by saying that I will and I will.

The difference between my wife and I is that she takes everything seriously and I have yet to find something that I can take seriously.

“I thought you were going to take out the trash,” he told me the other day.

“I will,” I mumbled to him as he was reading.

“When?” He said with a very severe tone in his voice. “You said you would yesterday.”

Being very nonchalant, I said, “Well, there is always tomorrow.” Then I would laugh. However, I realized that she never laughed.

I’m not really sure how many times I put that on him, but he finally had enough.

Looking at me, he said, “You said that yesterday. This is the tomorrow you were talking about yesterday.”

I had to stop and think about what he was talking about. Tomorrow and yesterday are just words as far as I’m concerned.

During this break, I didn’t think too much about the schedule. And as far as I’m concerned, yesterday and tomorrow have no real meaning to me. One day is as good as the other.

My wife, on the other hand, has a schedule that she loves to stick to. In fact, since this hiatus, he has cleaned the house from top to bottom 117 times. At least that seems to me.

Our house is so clean that I no longer have a reason to sneeze. If there was dirt, pollen or dust, it was completely gone. He didn’t know how much he enjoyed the powder.

We were watching TV together the other night, and a ridiculous idea was dancing through my head. With nothing else to think about, this idea became focused.

Doing a commercial, I looked across the room and my wife said, “What are you looking at?”

Staring at it, I pointed and said, “Is that dust I see there?”

As I watched her search for that nonconformist speck of dust, I couldn’t help but think of a scripture verse. “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever” (Hebrews 13: 8).

One thing I have learned is that all my yesterdays, today and tomorrow are in the hands of God, and I have nothing to worry about.